There is no better way to celebrate freedom than with cookie butter.
Finals are over. I’m still recovering from the subsequent brain mush, and other exam side effects such as using effects correctly and saying subsequent in casual speech. Together, we can find a cure.
Behold. The cure.
Sugar pretty much always does the trick, even if this happens to be sugar free sugar. But I digress. (Gosh, I need to stop it with the multi-syllabic words!)
Alright, allow me to begin my healing process. Me like cookies chocolate chip. Me like cookie butter. Me sad Trader Joe’s say bye bye cookie butter. (Again.) Me thinks making cookie butter out of chocolate chip cookies will taste like sunshine lollipops and rainbows, but with half the calories. Me right.
Please accept my apologies for dropping off the map there. Finals prep was rather difficult, but it’s over now (woo!). And with my free time in the summer (woohoo!), I have some schmancy stuff planned for us. I’m excited to get to know you all better!
Now. Homemade cookie butter. Let’s do this.
Because almonds are amazingful with their taste and their health properties and their ability to make you fly and walk on water or something of that nature, we’re going to utilize their amazingfullness here. Spellcheck can’t even handle its excitement.
Keep on truckin’. Or processin’. Your call, but you gotta keep moving forward.
Next, your nuts are going to clump into little balls. Yes, I hear it. Nuts clump into balls. Haha. Nut and ball jokes. I’m surrounded by high schoolers, so I know this goes. It’s all very funny.
More nut clumping. Have we sufficiently dug our minds out of the gutter yet? Good.
Now here’s the uber special part. Normally in making nut butter, you would stop processing here. But because we want butter so creamy and amazing that it will put all other creamy and amazing things to shame, we’re going to keep the process going for a bit more. This is deep stuff here.
There she is. The creamy amazingness that moved other supposed creamy amazing things to tears. Did you think inanimate objects can’t be so moved? It’s very simple. You pick them up and move them. (Inanimate objects are very agreeable towards this.) I’m so glad you were here for this momentous occasion.
Speaking of momentous occasions, I made a graphic for your seeing pleasure to explain this wonderful process of super creamy-ifying. (Deal with it spellcheck.)
And now it’s cookie time. I love cookie time.
You can use a crushed cup of chocolate chip cookie you like, but, because I LOVE them, I used 10 chocolate chip olive oil cookie. Nudge, nudge.
Okay, the cookie butter is about to meet your face. Let the almond butter and the cookie get to know each other, add bit of sweetener, vanilla and salt to the party, and let your tongue mingle with the blade of the processor.
You didn’t hear that from me.
Dedicated with love to Hannah. We don’t need no Trader Joe’s to get cookie butter! People, this girl is super cool. Petticoats! Cookie butter! Oh, and Victoria, congrats on meeting your future husband. I’m so happy you’re happy. Now the whole world can ship you.
Yield: a generous cup
20 minPrep Time:
20 minTotal Time:
- 1 cup raw almonds
- 1 cup crushed chocolate chip cookies (I use Chocolate Chip Olive Oil Cookies )
- ¼ cup unsweetened almond milk
- ¼ teaspoon vanilla extract
- pinch salt
- sweetener to taste (I use 2 teaspoons erythritol)
- Add the raw almond to the bowl of a food processor. Turn the food processor on and let it process the nuts until they become creamy and butter-like, approximately 12 minutes, stopping to scrape down the bowl as needed. Please see above for step-by-step pictures.
- Once you have achieved almond buttery goodness, add in the crushed chocolate chips and let process until completely incorporated, about 3 minutes. Now add in the unsweetened almond milk, vanilla extract, and salt, and process until incorporated and smooth. Sweeten to taste.
- Kept in an airtight container in the fridge, this cookie butter should last for about a week. Spread on toast, scoop onto oatmeal, eat with a spoon, but most importantly, devour.
Nutritional information calculated with 10 Chocolate Chip Olive Oil Cookies and erythritol.
You may use any chocolate chip cookies you want, but I use Chocolate Chip Olive Oil Cookies.
You may substitute unsalted dry roasted almond for the raw almonds. I'm not ure how any other nuts would work in this recipe as I have not tried them.
You may substitute any milk for the unsweetened almond milk.
I store the cookie butter in a jar in the fridge, but any airtight container in the fridge should work just fine. The cookie butter should keep for about a week.
Have you ever tried cookie butter? What do you think? Are you in love?
Yes. Amazing. Yes. If you think you’ve found love, try this homemade version first. It has chocolate. ‘Nuff said.
P.S. Do I get extra points for using so many forms of the word “amazing” that are not in the dictionary in one (highly humor attempting) post?