How to Make Friends: Homemade Chocolate

You just became more popular.

You finally made it onto the Christmas party list for that really cool and rich friend of a friend. They ask you to make dessert.

You start flipping out.

What should I bring? Should I make something? No, I should buy something. But that’s a cop-out! What if they don’t like what I bring? There goes my chance of ever being connected to the cool crowd! NOOOOOO!!!!!

Stop panicking.


You email everyone on your contact list in an utter frenzy trying to get suggestions on what to do.

I write you back with a link to this recipe.

Your hands quiver nervously as you scroll down this very page.

You wonder why I know exactly what you’re thinking.

I tell you to not worry your pretty little head about that and keep reading.

You do keep reading, but make a mental note to ask me about it later.

You leap to your kitchen, whip out all these ingredients, stick them in the freezer, and wait in nail-biting anticipation.

You slowly pull the dish out of the freezer, carefully cut off a piece, and, your heart pounding, you take a bite.

And then you dance.

You dance all around the kitchen, striking all kinds of hip dance moves you’re making up on the spot that are sure to start a trend.

No time to waste, you ten times the batch, and head to your party in some drop-dead outfit.

The host, getting complimented on this phenomenal chocolate, personally seeks you out.

She thanks you profusely, and introduces herself as the most cutting edge casting director in the world.

She observes how beautiful and charming you are, and decides to put you into your own TV show.

You become an overnight sensation, gaining millions of dollars and countless adoring fans.

You the build a charity foundation (with your name on it, of course) which brings world peace and cures every disease humans can catch.

All because of this chocolate.

So you’re going to make this now. Right?

Homemade Chocolate (Vegan, Raw, Gluten Free)


Adapted from CCK


4T coconut oil (If you don’t want a coconut flavor, don’t use virgin coconut oil. If want it to be raw, use virgin.)

9T unsweetened cocoa powder (use raw if desired)

40 drops of stevia (reduce or increase depending on your taste)

5T water


Mix all ingredients and freeze until firm in an airtight container.


Popularity tastes really good.


-Kelly M.

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  1. says

    I love this, your post just instantly put a smile on my face! I could totally see myself dancing around my kitchen the way you describe. Ok who am I kidding I frequently do that! The chocolate looks absolutely amazing!

    Have a wonderful Thursday! The weekend is in site!

  2. Glenda says

    I have two different kind of coconut oils. I have liquid and I have a firm set type. Which one do I need to use for this recipe?


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